04 November 2010

Receiving Feedback - Listening More and Taking Up Fierce One

If we carefully assess ourselves, we will find a reality. Most of us (including the ones who we call bravo) have a common feature in receiving feedback. We fail pathetically in receiving which is much directed and fierce even if they are constructive feedback. We always want sugar or sugar coated tablets. Not the real, hard to chew and bitter tablets. We would like to have a big session on giving and receiving feedback - a juicy presentation, quite cinematic role plays. It is so nice to call it as an art. But we aren't artist. 

We react and keep reacting until the point where the guy who is giving feedback retracts and becomes no longer interested in you. If we are attentive a bit and involved a little, there will be excellent opportunity for a great learning. Rather than listening, many of us naturally tend to react and some of us over react. Because we never wanted to appear insane even though the reality is exact opposite.

Recently, I had some excellent learning when i was meeting fresher who were so down-to-earth to listen to the feedback. They are smart enough to make on the course correction and it shows me that the world is changing a lot. But the point is - are we part of the change? The species that get along with the change and help the change will survive and the egoistic ducks will sit there and quack. Are we ready to be a one-among-stiff ducks?

How do we reach there? Why are we so insensitive to honest feedback? Why do we market ourselves differently, appear differently while we are totally different in reality - it is complete package of insanity. Why aren't we attuned to people who are honestly sitting in front of us with only one thing in mind - "you got to be a hero as you have huge potential?" We always want role plays. Some X talking to Y and we are quite quick with our observations. We want to sit in fence to watch and forget the fact that we ought to be players. No more role plays, let us not be jury of reality shows. Let us participate and go humane :-)

In the quite rapidly changing world, the way we compose ourselves, the way we "add value" through honesty and integrity is going to make a BIGGER sense than technological edge. Receiving feedback is a pinch in it that reveals a lot.

So, our true patronage manifests with the way we take fierce feedback by listening more & with honestly. It doesn't matter it is from up or down the hierarchy.

What do you think?

At the end, my Diwali wishes on behalf of Unstuck. Let us lit up the light and let the sunshine be on you

"Wish You a Very Happy Diwali"


Kiruba said...

Yes agreed completely, listening to feedback honestly even helps in improving relationship with others.
A person who has high listening skills are more believed by others.
This helps in healthy growth towards the top of ladder and also in personal life as well.
As you said if one tend to react insane to the feedbacks, he loose people, which is a huge cost to pay back, in other sense you loose one of your guide.

Lakshmi Narayanan N said...


cool insights.

also, along with listening the stress has to be emotionally detach from the person who is giving the feedback and absorbing the facts and inferring his view from the facts.

Sandy said...

"Rather than listening, many of us naturally tend to react.." - This line reminds me something about Karma which I'd read way back in 10td Standard. The gist of that was - Most of us don't do Karma [action] but do Prati-Karma [reaction]. Karma brings divinity, happiness and takes us closer to God [inner-self] while Prati-Karma does the opposite.

Lakshmi Narayanan N said...


Agreed. Good point :-)